A doodling journey

I invited Frank over to critique my first batch of oil paintings. I knew I couldn't go any further without deep diving into the question of contents. To paint without contents is like throwing a strand of noodle against the wall and hopes that it will stick. It's no fun without contents. Everything becomes random. Nothing matters. I didn't know what Frank was going to say. When I saw how deeply Frank was gazing at the majestic trees and the few fluttering leaves of early spring in my backyard, I knew right away where the source of my contents were going to be. I have been painting the same back yard ever since we had moved into the house 6 months before COVID started and no way was I gazing so deeply like Frank the minute he walked into the house. It was back to basic w 1 color drawing something I had done when I first came out to paint in Central Park w him. It was time to stop what I already know and go back to exploring the unknown. I remembered how Tom used to doodle. I always admired his doodling. It is an important process of emptying one's mind and breathe. Just make the marks freely without thoughts, mind and self. To play essentially. I never really played as a child. To not make importance of anything but the thing itself i.e. the marks on the page. Doodling has to be quick and spontaneous. Everything should be ready whenever there is an urge to doodle. I bought this really cute leather handbag that would have everything I need. Very little set up required. It's not painting and no one will see them. Just a spontaneous exercise of mark making. Start w 1 color, then 2, 3, 4 and in combination. Landscape then vertical. Just see the trees, the branches and the leaves for what they are as I feel them. See how the blue sky sits in the empty spaces between them. No need to depict but to accept the moment as is. It's a way to empty the mind, the fears, the inhibition, the worries, the pressures, the judgements and so on. It is just an exercise of being so to feel free. And to breathe freely. It takes practice. 6 months later I am still no where there but improving. Too many things still get in the way and too many excuses. But it's ok. Just have to keep doing it again and again.